Saturday, February 21, 2015

Final comment on my MA

The last 5 months have been the most nerve-wracking time of my life. But all my efforts and achings paid off: I got M.A degree with distinction (meaning honor I think). Oddly enough, my emotional roller coaster reached the top when I sent the dissertation to my university in the UK. So, when I got the result with an honorable award, I felt strangely calm. I felt the sense of achievement and self-indulging excitement only when I announced the result on Facebook and received numerous warm comments from my friends.

At the moment, I've been thinking what's next while my daughter is doing her best to get into the high school she would like to be for the next three years and my partner is doing his best to get a PhD. I'm not anxious about their results. I'm sure they will get what they deserve and they deserve what they wish to have. Perhaps this is what I've learned from MA course. I don't need to worry what I get because I deserve what I deserve anyway. Lots of luck with supports will follow when you can imagine what you need to do and do the best you can. So, here is the path of success of your goal:

1 Dream.
2 Imagine how you get the dream come true.
3 Do it!

DID will get you what you desire eventually. When my daughter was the first grader in a primary school, I had only the Japanese high school diploma. As my daughter is about to become 10th grader this spring, I have a master's degree in TESOL. It is quite an achievement for a lazy and dreamy mum like myself. I have been a dreamer ever since I was born. I can easily imagine something, but I never had steadfast determination to realize the dreams until I had this beautiful baby and the sense of responsibility.

The first challenge was to quit smoking when I conceived my daughter. I dreamed to have a healthy baby, imagined how I could quit smoking and did it. Her presence in my belly got the steadfast determination to achieve this goal. I was a heavy smoker (Three packs a day: a chain smoker) and it wasn't an easy job.

The second challenge was to get a driver's license within the minimum amount of time and cost when my daughter was 2. I dreamed places where I can go with my baby in a car, imagined how I could get the license within a few months and did it. Driving skill is, by the way, one of the most useful skills a mum can have since there are many more occasions than you can ever imagine when you need to get to a certain place (for instance, the hospital) as fast as possible desperately.

The third challenge came to my mind when she entered a primary school. While I was nagging her to do her best at school, I thought to myself,  "I should go back to school and do my best if I tell her to do so." It took me one year to get all the required documents and put myself together. I enrolled in a university to get my BA degree through corresponding course, as my daughter became a second grader. I dreamed to graduate the uni as she graduates her primary school, imagined how to get all the credits by then and did it.

Then the latest challenge came right after the third as my daughter entered a junior high. This time I was more interested in how far I could go on the academic ladder. I dreamed to be awarded MA in the UK, imagined how to work on it and did it. This time, my daughter didn't motivate me in a direct manner, yet her constant criticism and rebellious behavior brought my unyielding spirit. With lots of support from my friends and family, I was able to maintain my determination.

Now it's my daughter's turn to realize her goal and she's shown me how mature and wise she has become. Her spirit inspires me to set a new goal. I can't fully imagine how I pull it off yet. But when I do, you know I will do it :-)